Theme Songs

So, can't really form a cohesive thought today...just thought I would share some of my current theme songs for my life:


Avril Lavigne's "Run Away"


Sugarland's "It Happens"



Gary Allan's "Life Ain't Always Beautiful"

The Vacuum Cleaner from Another Dimension

Wow, I should do blogfests more often! Welcome, newcomers, to the craziness that is me!

Thought I would give you an update on what's been going on with me (and, yes, vacuum cleaners will be involved). My fiance and I are currently living with my parents. Yay. I just found out that the house we're supposed to be moving into will not be ready for another week (surprise, surprise!), so, if I'm lucky, I will be moving into the new place the weekend before my wedding.

::Cue hysterical laughter::

We will also have to buy a refrigerator for the new place. So much for trying to crawl my way out of debt.

But, some good news! I am going to have a short story published! And I will get paid for it! Yay! It will be in an ebook and possibly even a print edition. We shall see. I'll keep you updated as soon as I know more.

Last night Fiance and I spent the majority of our time cleaning the old house for the new renters (because we're nice like that). I changed from my work clothes into some grubby clothes and put my engagement ring and watch in my dress pants pocket. (Do you see where this is going?)

While I'm shampooing the carpet in the master bedroom, Fiance is vacuuming the living room. He picks up my work clothes (do you see where this is going?) and my ring and watch fall out. He vacuums up my ring.

Yep.

No big deal, right? After all, there are only so many places something vacuumed up can go, right?

So I didn't panic. I sort of laughed and was like, "Well, you did it so you get it out, Fiance," and continued shampooing carpets.

Thirty minutes and a shredded vacuum cleaner bag later, still no ring.

!!!

I start getting a little panicky. Maybe it's stuck in the filter, hose, brush, etc. Fiance doesn't hear it rattling around, but I insist that maybe its lodged in there somehow.

We proceed to destroy the vacuum cleaner. We smash and break. We tear the thing to pieces.

Still no ring.

We get out the metal detector and go through the contents of the vacuum's bag carpet bunny by carpet bunny. I suggest we set it all on fire. Fiance barely manages to talk me out of it.

We check the entire living room floor, under the porch, between the cracks in the steps, in the grass. We find a washer and a tent stake, but no ring.

I'm hysterical at this point. WTF? What happened? Did the vacuum cleaner transport the ring to another dimension? This, really, sounds like the only logical conclusion.

At this point, we have spent almost an hour and a half looking for this ring.

I'm in tears. Fiance is trying to console me with "It has insurance, we can replace it. It's just a ring."

"It's not just a ring!" I wail. "It's my ENGAGEMENT ring!"

(Gentlemen, there is no reasoning with a hysterical woman who just lost her engagement ring.)

It's 9:30 p.m. The neighbors think we're crazy because not only have we borrowed their metal detector, but now we need to borrow their vacuum cleaner. (We neglected to tell them what EXACTLY happened to ours.) We finish cleaning to the harmony of my sniffles.

We get to my parent's house at approximately 10 p.m. I unleash my cat and he immediately gets into a fight with my mom's cat. We have to separate them. Mom tells us that my chihuahua might be having puppies. I contemplate calling into work and taking a mental health day.

But I don't.

I get up. Drive to Lincoln. Drop off boots for my bridesmaid to wear to her fitting. Drop off Jake (he promises to look for my ring while he waits for the tow truck to haul his old car to the new place) and head to work.

Halfway there he calls to tell me that the tow truck people didn't show up. And then he says, "Oh, by the way, will you marry me?"

"You found it!"

"Yep."

"Where was it?"

"In the lining of the vacuum cleaner's bag." We searched that, like, six times and never saw anything. I swear.

"So we killed the vacuum cleaner for nothing."

"Looks like it."

Sigh. Wake me up when September ends.

One Hundred Years: Fairytale Blogfest Entry

In lieu of Monday Madness, I'm posting my entry into Emily White's Fairytale Blogfest . The prizes are divine and, even if I don't win, I enjoyed morphing a traditional fairytale into a different genre. Nice stretch of the writerly muscles, if you will. And, hopefully, it will provide you guys with some entertainment. ;) Also, it's flash fiction, which is a challenge in and of itself. Enjoy!

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"Sleeping Beauty"

Sleep for one hundred years. Wake up in a new world.

The idea had appealed to me. But I’d been attracted to the fine print far more: When you wake up, you might not know who you are.

“An unfortunate side-effect,” the sloe-eyed scientist said, her red mouth curving. “But compared to losing a limb, what’s a little memory loss?”

“Where do I sign?” I asked.

I was twenty-five, far too young to want to forget who—and what—I was. Years of therapy hadn’t taught me how to accept the past however and, no matter how hard I tried to put it behind me, it kept poisoning my future. It would be easier to forget.

I readied the small cylindrical container that was to hold my personal items; everything I placed inside was impersonal. A comb. A bedroll. A spare uniform. A laser pistol. Nothing that said, “This is Aurora King.”

“If it isn’t Sleeping Beauty.”

I turned. Mac sauntered toward me. He too had signed up for the mission, but his reasons were all monetary. Though, if asked, he probably would have claimed otherwise.

Even in the spaceship’s harsh fluorescent lighting, Mac was beautiful—six feet of muscle and ego—and another thing I hoped to forget.

He propped an elbow against my sleeper capsule and crossed his ankles, flashing a grin. “So, Rory, want me to wake you with a kiss when we reach Epsilon 12?”

A number of hostile responses rose to my lips, but I choked them down. Shaking my head, I forced a smile. “Sure, Mac. If you remember.”

“Oh, I’ll remember.” He slid a hand down my cheek. “I’d never forget you.”

“Pretty words for a bastard,” I said lightly, pulling away.

His mouth thinned. “I told you that she came on to me, Rory. Nothing happened. You said you forgave me, so why are you still holding a grudge?”

“Forgiveness doesn’t equal forgetfulness.” I raised my chin. “And once a cheater, always a cheater.”

“For God’s sake—“

“All right, crew,” Commander Roberts yelled. “Get into your sleepers. Five minutes to launch!” Grateful for the interruption, I sealed my canister and locked it into the sleeper.

“Maybe you will forget. I hope you do.” He gave a sad smile and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “See you in a hundred years, babe.”

My stomach twisted as I watched him walk away.  He stretched out in his sleeper capsule and technicians began attaching various wires to his torso and arms. A blend of chemical compounds gurgled at the sleeper’s foot—the magical mixture that would freeze his limbs and organs for one hundred years while we traveled through space to Epsilon 12, the promise land. Mac noticed me watching and his lips puckered. A lump formed in my throat and I looked away.

“Bed time,” Commander Roberts said.

I nodded, sliding onto the cold metal. Technicians swarmed me. A needle pricked my skin. I fell asleep praying I’d forget, but I was no longer sure what.

Hyper-sleep shrinks years to seconds and, all too soon, I felt lips on mine. My eyes flew open, my knee jerked up, and someone cursed.

“Jesus, Rory! You nearly castrated me!”

I blinked up at the domed, metal ceiling. The lights flickered and buzzed. Dust furred every surface.  One hundred years. I closed my eyes. Did I remember?

Dark room. Hands touching. Cold skin. Goosebumps. Dolls. Doctors offering peach, plastic parts. Where did Daddy touch you?

I ripped off the IVs, the plastic suction cups attached to my chest, the multi-colored tubing. The sleeper’s sensors screamed a warning. I hung my head over the side and vomited the black bile of my stomach.

When my stomach was empty, I still heaved. Distantly, I felt a hand on my back, rubbing. I tried to shift away, but the hand gripped my shoulder. “Easy, Aurora. Easy.”

I looked out of the corner of my eye. A tall, handsome man stood there. He was vaguely familiar, especially the sultry curve of his mouth, but I couldn’t place him.

“Who…who are you?” I rasped.

He paused. His brown eyes darkened. He opened his mouth. Shook his head. He glanced down at the ring on the hand that gripped my shoulder and then at my own hand. A gold band glimmered on the ring finger of my left hand.

“Don’t you remember, Rory?” he asked.

Too much, I wanted to say. I shook my head instead.

“I’m your husband.”

I searched his face. Uncertainty etched fine lines around his mouth—I remembered that expression. I touched his face and bit my lip.

“I remember…”

His hand gripped mine. “What, Rory? What do you remember?”

Our wedding day. Nights of kissing and touching. Days of laughter and teasing. My fingers traced his jaw, his unsmiling lips. I kept thinking there was something else, something more, flitting on the edges of my memory like an elusive fairy godmother.

Mac’s fingers squeezed mine, and it no longer mattered.

“I remember loving you,” I said.

He smiled and lowered his mouth to mine. “Sleeping Beauty,” he murmured against my lips.

His kiss deepened.

And I forgot everything else.

Mockingjay!!

Ready for my review on Mockingjay?

Too bad.

Lol.

I have finished the series, now. And, yes, I loved them. Yes, I want to rave and rave and gush and gush, but I won't. Why? Because I don't really want to spoil them for you. Let's just say that Ms. Collins lived up to the expectations set forth in The Hunger Games. The last book was...amazing. Truly. GO READ IT NOW. (It also made me cry...::sniffle::)

As for how my life is going. Ha. Ha. I'm not sure if I bent your ear on my current living situation or not, but here it goes. We are supposed to be moving into this house on a farm. Great deal. Me? I wasn't thrilled about moving before the wedding because I'm already crazy with that, so I didn't really need any more stress. BUT they just HAVE to have someone move in ASAP because there is a lot of expensive equipment on said property that needs to be watched. They wanted us to move in Sept. 1 or sooner.

All right. Since it is such a great deal, I agreed even though I knew it would make me almost unbearable to be around. And for the most part I have kept my cool. People have remarked on how calm I am and all that... I just laugh because THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON IN MY HEAD.

Because, at this moment, the house is not ready to be moved into. And the house I currently live in has to be vacated BY Sept. 1 so the new renters can move in. Sept. 1 is this upcoming Wednesday.

You see my dilemma.

I'm so high-strung that I can't have sugar or caffeine because it's making me shake. (Which is really depressing since I live off of sugar and caffeine.) The wedding is three weeks away and I'm horrified at the thought that I might be living with my parents. :P

We're moving this weekend (even if we don't know where). And that's the scary part...I have no idea where the heck I will be on Monday. I will probably show up to work being all crazy-eyed and spend most of the day in my chair rocking back and forth.

Newsroom Headline: Bride-to-be Loses Sanity, Fiance Nowhere to Be Found (Because he will run away)

I Stole This Truck...Uh, I mean "Photo"

I like to do things backwards, apparently. I read Lydia Sharp's post on 15 inspirations and was like, hmm, what are my inspirations for Dragon Queen? I came up with five. Three songs and two images.


1. Linkin Park's NEW DIVIDE



2. Kelly Clarkson's BEAUTIFUL DISASTER



3. Disturbed's THE NIGHT



4.

5.

And that just wasn't enough. I wanted to come up with 15 inspirations (even if they're after the fact). So I whip out my handy-dandy Google and start searching for random things.

Using the search "red princess" I found this...

http://anathematixs.deviantart.com/

First reaction: OMG!!!

Second reaction: ZOMG!!!

This is EXACTLY how I pictured my MC, Jade. This artist (Suzanne van Pelt) totally shares my brain waves. I mean, holy cow!!! Craziness. I couldn't even draw Jade this well. (And I tried.) This artist is, seriously, my new best friend. 

So, even though I was cheating on my inspirations, I'm glad I found this photo. It's totally my new inspiration. 

Have you ever stumbled upon a picture/photo that fit your MC perfectly? Please share!

Monday Madness: Why Stephenie Meyers May Be a Genius

I waffle between admiring Twilight and what it has accomplished in the YA world and really, really despising it.

The young love angst is something every young girl can relate to. (I once had the most painful crush on a guy for three days before I knocked some sense into myself.) Twilight also expounds on the theme of being loved and protected in the face of trials/evil. When you're 16, I could see the appeal. But then there are articles like this and this, and I can't help but pull my hair out and/or snicker.

And yet...

Ms. Meyers was on to something. The Oatmeal slams Bella for being a "lego character". He points out that we never get a clear picture of what Bella looks like and that, in fact, anyone can slip into her skin and pretend to be her. He thinks it's a bad thing, and I can see his point. But I also think it makes Ms. Meyer's a genius.

In a world of RPGing, internet dating and the like, everyone is trying to be someone else. Ms. Meyer's just caught on to that and used it in a different venue.

From a writer's standpoint, it makes me cringe. A story isn't supposed to be about someone who has so little personality it could be anyone, it's supposed to be about a specific character with specific wants, dreams and goals. And yet, from a money-making standpoint all I see is dollar signs. $$$$

Let's admit it, there's a reason why Twilight is so popular. And I think it's Bella's very vagueness that makes all the girls squee, OMG, that could totally be me!

So, Twilight... Love it. Hate it. Either way, Ms. Meyers might have opened the door onto a completely new way of shaping a character.

But the question is: Was it intentional?

(What do you think?)

It Will All Be Over Soon

One of my coworkers came up to me this morning and asked that simple question, "How are you?" 

My reply? "Ask me after September 18th."

Because right now I'm so overwhelmed and stressed out that just THINKING about how overwhelmed and stressed out I am makes everything worse. So I'm living on a moment-by-moment basis. And when I'm not running around like a chicken with my head cut off (nice simile, eh?) then I'm having to distract myself with mind-absorbing things.

So I bought Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins yesterday. No, I couldn't really afford it (hardback), but I bought it simply as a way to preserve my sanity. (At least that's what I'm telling myself.) 

I also keep telling myself that next week will better. And the week after that. And the week after that. Before I know it, it will be September 18th, I will be married and I will no longer have to even THINK about all the crap I need to do for the wedding. And, yes, I am so freaking glad that Fiance and I are going to Spa City (that's Hot Springs for you non-Arkies) for our honeymoon. Mineral baths? Oh yes. Massages? Thank you, God. Jacuzzi in the room... :D

And after it's all said and done, I will be so blissfully happy. Because it's over with and, dear Lord, I will NEVER have to do this again. 

So, for all you married folks out there, do you have any pointers on how to keep your pre-wedding sanity? (Not the jitters, I'm not worried about the actual marrying part.) Because I need some help!